Kestrel – It’s been an honor

Hello. My name is Kestrel. I’m a senior in high school (18 years old), and I just recently was asked to write an essay for a college entrance application regarding a book series that really influenced me. I wrote about your series, Oracles of Fire. After finishing the essay, I decided I wanted you to read it as well. I know you’ll probably gather this from the essay, but your books have meant a lot to me and have greatly shaped my faith as well as other aspects of my life. In light of that, I wanted to say thank you–thank you for giving me hope and showing me what a relationship with the God of the Universe can look like.

I remember in sixth grade a friend of mine recommended that I read a series called Oracles of Fire by Bryan Davis. I loved reading, and she was willing to lend me the first two books, so I began the series. I didn’t realize it at the time, but this series was going to change my life. Before I get ahead of myself, I suppose I should tell you a little about me. I was raised in a Christian home and had been homeschooled before beginning to attend a Christian private school in fifth grade.

I had been baptized in early elementary school and, honestly, I considered myself a great Christian. However, if you had asked me what a personal relationship with Christ Jesus looks like, I would not have been able to answer. Also, starting about fifth grade, I had begun struggling with depression. It wasn’t particularly severe at the time, but it had been steadily growing worse ever since.

So there I was, a depressed sixth grader reading a new series, expecting nothing more than a good story. The first thing I noticed about these books was that they were obviously Christian. Biblical characters made appearances throughout the story, and prophets of the Most High spoke to the characters in songs. This didn’t bother me. It surprised me, but I had grown up reading the Bible, so I wasn’t offended or uncomfortable. The Bible just provided the setting of the story, or so I thought.

A few chapters into the first book I met a character named Sapphira Adi. As I read her story, a story of betrayal and loneliness written in blood and tears, I felt my heart go out to her. She was lonely as I was lonely—hurting in all the ways I was hurting. Yet her life was worse than mine. She had lost a best friend and twin, while I had just always lived without one. She had been abused, while I just felt unloved. In every way, she was worse off than I was. I wanted to meet her. I wanted to be able to show her that she could have a friend. I continued reading, desperate to know whether there was hope for the lonely freaks of nature in the world.

It was then that she met our Lord. I had known Christ, grown up with the Gospel, but as He revealed Himself to Sapphira, I caught a glimpse of what His love really looks like. Sapphira’s life didn’t become perfect in an instant. She still faced loneliness and depression, but now she had hope: no matter what anyone said or did, she wasn’t alone for her Lord was with her.

That summer, I was sitting alone at camp when I had my worst depression spell yet. I still remember how cold and dark the air around me felt, even though it was the middle of the day in the hot Texas summer. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. All I knew was that no one was there and if I disappeared, no one could care. I was alone.

Then, like a thin stream of cold water flowing onto parched ground, words I had memorized began to seep into my mind. When I had first read the Oracles of Fire series, I had memorized one of the songs in it, because it perfectly summarized the hope that had saved Sapphira’s life. That hot summer day, in my darkest hour, I remembered the words. It was like being jolted awake from a nightmare.

In that moment I realized that I had been depressed, something I had never realized before. Even more incredibly, I have not had another episode of depression since. That’s why I will recommend this series to anyone and everyone—I believe it saved my life. I don’t know if I would have committed suicide; but if my depression, which had begun when I was so young, had continued, it’s very possible that I would have.

So I want to leave you with the words that saved my life on that summer day: “Whither shall I go from Thy Spirit, or whither shall I flee from Thy Presence? If I ascend up into Heaven, Thou art there. If I make my bed in Hell, behold, Thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there shall Thy hand lead me and Thy right hand shall hold me. If I say surely the darkness shall cover me, even the night shall be light about me. Yea the darkness hideth naught from Thee, but the night shineth as the day, for the darkness and the light are both alike to Thee” (Psalms 139:7-12 KJV).

Thanks again for everything. It’s been an honor, truly.

Sincerely,
Kestrel
An Oracle of Fire